Smoking Meats < Steaming Hams

"Yes, here i am, doing human stuff, on my human things, with my fellow humans."

He's the reason captcha exists

1:26 “ribs and the brisket need to be… eaten…?”

human af

WE HAVE JUST APPLIED THE SWEET BABY RAY'S

He often says weird shit when he hasn't been under his heat lamp for a while.

Someone needs to update his vocabulary software

Hey everyone. We are LIVE from my BACKYARD... where I am smoking a... brisket and some ribs. I am… I’m making meats now. Smoking these meats here. Our little meat smoking. It’s smoking, so. I’m the meat chef. Yeah, someone asked me, do I smoke meat? Smoking meat. Smoking these meats. Smoking meats earlier in the day. Smoking these meats. Just set the charcoal up and you set the uh… the woodchips up. Smoking meats. Grilling, grilling meats. Good smokey flavor. Smoke a brisket for like 12 hours. You smoke lemon chicken. Smoke salmon, you’ll love it. Bison sirloin. Ribs and sausage. So I’m looking forward to… to that. (breathes heavily :D). Today we got a brisket on the big guy and… some… pork ribs… um uh, on… on… the uh, the green egg (stares at the camera). Meat like a brisket. I got ribs in there. Finishing off the brisket and the ribs. And I’m just… sitting in our backyard… finishing off this brisket… and these ribs. But hopefully, for Canadian Thanksgiving, you get to eat a lot of brisket and ribs. How many of you guys are eating brisket and ribs tonight? Brisket and… and ribs. They taste doubly better… when um… when you hunted the animal yourself, so. Wha-what are you guys making for dinner? Brisket and ribs I hope. Delicious. Brisket and ribs. The ribs and the brisket need to be… eaten. I want to try your brisket? I want to try my brisket. It’s a pretty tough cut of meat. Eat ribs… and the brisket. Are you excited to have a rib tonight? I want my baby back, baby back ribs! Yeah, that’s what I’m talking about. Sweet Baby Ray’s Barbeque Sauce. That is going on the ribs. Sweet Baby Ray’s. Sweet Baby Ray’s. The Sweet Baby Ray’s. Sweet Baby Ray’s is very good. Sweet Baby Ray’s. Sweet Baby Ray’s. We just applied the Sweet Baby Ray’s. Sweet Baby Ray’s. Sweet Baby Ray’s. Maybe throw some Sweet Baby Ray’s on the ribs and… (turns to camera :D) take it from there. She’s waiting for her ribs. I mean, she uh, she knows what’s coming and uh. Sweet Baby Ray’s. (stares at the camera). So that’s... uh, that’s… that’s pretty good. Who doesn’t like ribs? Everyone likes ribs. Yeah no, this is… this is what Facebook Live is… is for. Just hanging out while you’re sitting in your backyard… uh, waiting for your brisket and your ribs to finish smoking. Are you guys ready? Check this out. This is, oh yeah. Look at that. Pretty good on the brisket. So yeah (stares at the camera :D).

Not sure I've ever seen a person fail the turing test before.

This man was born fully grown out of a plastic bag filled with gel.

I love how he talks about Sweet Baby Ray’s like it’s some gourmet shit.

he is the oddest “human” “alive”

“They taste doubly better when you’ve hunted the animal yourself”

He's acting like he's just a regular dude hanging out in his suburban backyard, when in fact, he bought out his entire block of houses so he could have privacy lmao

That was only 3 minutes!?

WE HAVE JUST APPLIED THE SWEET BABY RAY’S

"We have just applied the sweet baby rays" lmao

His “friends” only smile when mark looks at them lol