NOW, THE EXTENDED EXTENDED VERSION

The fact that Hakita is such a modern and awesome developer, we all fear that he will add ballin to Act III somehow.

"LeBron is dead, Ball is fuel, Court is full"

“Gabriel will never be bal-“

Now I really want a Ultrakill Basketball spin-off game where the gang stops dealing with some divine bullcrap and just play a friendly game of basketball.

"Gabriel looked upon the shot-clock with a perfect clarity. He dribbled his ball and held it in contrast to the backboard. In its reflection he saw a ball rebound, no longer wielded by the will of another team, but his own. He knew free throws alone would never sway the scoreboards. He chose to do something drastic."

Cerberus is a true baller though

I don't know why but something about Minos and Gabriel's dialogue being recontextualized in basketball makes it so much better.

“May your Ls be many, and your Jordans fake”

God damn, hearing Gabriel say "You make even the devil cry!" While absolutely ballin' on some poor soul is powerful

if hakita finds out about this he probably gonna add a basketball like secret in act 3

"hey v1, do you know Candi---"

Gabriel's dunk looks like its about to output as much energy as a neutron star going supernova the second it passes through the net.

Minos getting guarded by a Cerberus is peak comedy

PREPARE THYSELF, FOR I SHALL BE BALLIN.

This is unironically godly

V1 proceeds to toss all 4 of their coins, juggle them with punch, shoot the ball forward, propelled by an overcharged explosion, sending the ball ricocheting to the 4 coins as it slams right down the hoop at 4 times the terminal velocity of the basketball.

I just want to see Space Jam now but with all the New Blood characters.

Ultrakill memes are beyond divine

honestly I just love the "faint godly lafter" schick after Minos hits the USELESS and Gabrial's in a holy pose. Just eminates raw power